Monday, April 30, 2007

Melbourne retroactive post: Day 3


A look down the Beach Trail.

Here we go...

Day three was spent walking the beaches around Melbourne. As I've written before, I don't come from a land of sandy beaches, so this was fun. But before we get there...



This was taken along the Australian Heritage Bridge (actually on Day 2, I just forgot to put it up). Its a depiction of an Aboriginal. Across the bridge there are similar structures representing the various people who have come to Australia. Its pretty cool to see.



Keeping with the aboriginal theme is this eagle. In Aboriginal mythology, the Eagle was very important. Its patriarchal (while the matriarch is the black swan) So, a gigantic one watches over the Docklands.



It wasn't all beaches...I also walked through an environment reclamation project, which offered up that cool view of a bridge. But, you want to see sand so, here you go.



Here's Port Phillip Bay...behold its awesomeness. As I've written before, I love the ocean because of its size. Its just awe inspiring that no matter how tall we build a skyscraper, no matter how huge we build a stadium, the Earth comes up with something to tower over it. Here's two pics that (somewhat artistically, but not really) sum that up.



Note the people in the foreground and the ginormous body of water in front of them.


Fun with piers!

Anyway, enough of me trying to be artistic. The Beach Trail is fun to walk along. Beautiful people, waves crashing (a very soothing sound) and it was a sunny day. And lest you forget you're by the ocean (how could you...its right there.) there were lighthouses.




As I continued down the beach, I stumbled across something I had never seen before. Kiteboarding. I explained what it was already, so here's the photographic evidence.


Don't sop believin...hold on to that parachute, kiteboarder dude!!!

In terms of insane things I'd like to try once in my life, I think kiteboarding may have made the list. It looks like a good time, when you get the hang of it.

Moving along the ocean front I found this statue of Captain Cook.



Cook is kind of a big deal down here, as he discovered the place. I think that warrants a statue. Not far from Cook, was an Australian War Memorial, also very worthy.





Keeping with the war theme, not for from the Aussie war memorial, there was a St. Kilda War Memorial which I found to be inspiring.



St. Kilda was quite nice. I bought a painting at a street market down here and mingled for a bit. I also stumbled upon Luna Park, which was terrifying.


That clown will eat you...and your soul.

After looking at Luna Park, I began the long walk home. Not sure how far it was, but I walked for seven hours that day. But, as a result, on my way back to the hostel, I got this cool (albeit blurry) pic of Melbourne at night!



Hope you enjoyed the pics...not sure what the next post will be of. Possibly the long awaited Vegemite post?

Stay tuned,

Alan

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Sunday, April 29, 2007

Aussie Rules football and MCG

The Melbourne Cricket Ground. Behold its awesomeness!

I know what you're thinking. You're thinking, "I demand Melbourne retroactive post day 2!"

This is basically it. I went to an Aussie Rules match for Day 2. So, we're all happy.

Australian Rules Football is an outstanding combination of being one of the strangest sporting events I've been to and one of the most exciting. Here's what you need to know rules wise in order to follow an AFL match.

1. The field is an oval. Not a rectangle. Hooray for cricket influences.

2. No offsides. Whee! Players can go wherever they want.

3. You can run the ball, but must bounce it on the ground every 10 meters. Or you can sort of punch it to one of your teammates. Even better, kick it to them. If they catch it cleanly, its called a mark, and they can get a free kick.

4. Don't get tackled. If you get tackled, the umpire does a bounce.

5. Kick goals, not behinds.


Here we see a picture of an AFL goal. The two tall posts in the middle are what players are aiming for. Kick it in between those and you score six points ( a goal). If you kick it between one of the large posts and one of the outer small ones...its a behind. You missed, you suck, but you earned a point.

Kicking behinds are referred to as misses. So, please, kick goals.

Now that you're caught up on the rules of the AFL, its time to discuss the MCG.

My cricket knowlege is...how do we put this...not great. My AFL knowlege, probably less. But still, when I came upon the Melbourne Cricket Ground, you can feel the history of the building. Its just one of those places that just has that majestic feel to it. I've only experienced this at one other stadium, that being Notre Dame Stadium. You may not be totally aware of the history of the place, but you know that , sporting wise anyway, its an important history.

Then you see the statues.



Sir Donald Bradman...knighted for his cricketeting abilities.

All around MCG are statues of cricketers, footballers, and a sprinter. All depicting the greatness of Australian athletes. One of my favourites was the statue of an original Austrain Rules game.



Note the headgear and clothing. Slightly different from what the boys wear today.

MCG was also the main stadium for Melbourne's 1954 Olympics. Lest you forget, here's a giant plaque commemorating the event.



It has all the gold medal winners from that Olympiad. Something I probably would have paid more attention to had it not been for the fans.

AFL fans are crazy passionate. The paint faces, wear costumes, are loud, and make walking around the outside of the ground a fun experience. I didn't take pics of the fans (don't ask why...I just didn't think to) but here's something interesting. At least to me.

In the AFL, there are 9 clubs based out of Melbourne. They are the St. Kilda Saints, Western Bulldogs, Collingwood Magpies, Hawthorn Hawks, Richmond Tigers, North Melbourne Kangaroos, Melbourne Demons, Carlton Blues, and the ESSENDON BOMBERS.

The match I attended was Carlton vs. Essendon in what the AFL termed the Rivalry Round. So, a good crowd was expected with both sides having pleanty of supporters. And what better way to support your club then to become a member?

Choose wisely.

Divided only by a path, are booths set up to become a member to Carlton or Essendon. A member, from what I gather, is kind of like getting season tickets in some ways, but in others its supporting the club. When I purchased my ticket for the match at Collingwood headquarters (considering that rivalry, it got a strange look, but thats where the Ticketech office was) I took a look at the Members options, but was still a bit confused by it. At any rate, becoming a member supports the club financially, and you get a hat out of the deal. I chose to pass.

As you can tell from what I linked, I'm an Essendon Supporter. This is due mostly to one of the main guys at the International Office being a Bombers fan, and so I followed suit. Doing research on Wikipedia I found that they're one of the most successful clubs in the AFL, having captured 16 Premierships (tied for most with Carlton). As a result, other fans refer to them as the 'Evil Empire' (well, I read that in the game day program, anyways) a term reserved for a baseball team I don't care for all that much. In addition, they're affiliated with Manchester United. So, how can I remain an Essendon supporter? Doesn't this have bandwagoner and evil written all over it?

Possibly, but considering they finished 15th last season, bandwagon is low. Plus, Steve Irwin was a fan. Got to do it for Steve. Also, everything I read about coach Kevin Sheedy has been awesome.

Sheedy is outspoken and quite the character. My favourite tidbit about him is he'll refer to "Martians" costing his side the game. The Martians are the officials, and he avoids fines. Brilliant.

Anyway...back to the game. Pie and chips in hand, I enter the MCG, and marvel at how big it is inside.



Not sure if that does it justice. It seats 100,000 people. There were about 65,000 in attendence for the game.

The atmosphere at the game is great. The crowd is into it the entire time and overall, there's kind of a college atmosphere to the game. Remember in high school when the football team ran through a paper banner on homecoming? That happens at AFL games!




OK, the players more or less run out from underneath it, but its still cool.

After the teams run out...its time for the bounce.



To start the game, the umpire bounces the ball off the ground, and then it kind of works like a tip off in basketball. By the way, the ball is that red thing thats level with the second tier in the stands. They get good height off of this thing.



An AFL goal judge signifies a goal by Essendon. This was a common site in the first quarter. Which resulted in seeing this...alot.



Club supporters use these gigantic poppoms to celebrate goals. The size of these things is scary. Now that you're frightened, here's possibly the funniest part of an AFL match.



When the ball goes out of bounds, the umpire faces the crowd and then flings the ball over his head. The two clubs then battle for possession. To see this is simply amazing. Of course, can you think of a better way to determine possession? Its more fair then a rugby union line out, and where's the fun of just giving it to one team. More power to you, Aussie Rules.

At this point, I'm greatly enjoying the match. I somehow got front row seats for thirty bucks (did I mention that? That was sweet, though next time I want to be higher up so that I can figure out whats going on) my team was up by 48 points, and I was going to finally see a club I chose to support win the first time I saw them play in person.

Wrong.

Carlton staged the largest comeback in their history and Essendon lost. Though considering the final score was 125-122, I can't say that I wasn't entertained. That was possibly the most fun I've had at a sporting event, and if its not at the top, its up there. Throw in the fact that the crowd was literally a fifty-fifty split between Carlton and Essendon fans, and the crowd was into it the whole game, and loud the entire fourth quarter (quarters are a half hour long, by the way.) it was an outstanding experience.

Anyway, as you can imagine, Carlton supporters were quite happy. I'll be a good sport and put up the pic, because its kind of cool.



The flags are really cool, and I wish we had this in America. At NRL and AFL matches, fans bring club flags to the game. Trust me, when a sea of flags comes up after a try or goal, its really cool, and I'd have to imagine a tad intimidating.

Day three pics coming later...possibly tonight after touch footy. Sorry for the abrupt end to the post, but it was long enough.

See the Bombers fly up,

Alan

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Friday, April 27, 2007

The retroactive Melbourne Post day 1

Here we go...some select photos of Melbourne.




View of Melbourne from the Rialto Towers. Its the tallest office building in the Southern hemisphere.




Bolte Bridge with bird in front.






Two examples of the unique architecture in Melbourne. Buldings had a lot of different colours then I'm used to seeing. Not sure what the first building is, but the second one is the Australian Customs Agency.



Melbourne skyline along the Yarra.




Melbourne is home to the Australian Open. Want to know how far it is to the other grand slams? This sign will tell you.



A very bizarre statue of a...I don't really know.

More to come later. Library's closing, so day 2 pics will come tomorrow. (hopefully).

Alan

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Wednesday, April 25, 2007

ANZAC Day

Yesterday was ANZAC (Australia New Zealand Army Corps) Day in Australia and New Zealand. This is the Australian version of Memorial Day. Throughout the country, thousands of people attended Dawn Services and parades to mark the occasion.

I did not attend a Dawn Service as, it happens at dawn. I did watch a few of the west coast ones on TV, and they are quite moving. A good combination of religious and patriotic, not heavy on either side.

After the dawn service, its a public holiday so...people drink. A lot. I went with a few mates to the Labour Club and the place was packed on a Wednesday afternoon. I mean, packed. The Labour Club is a members only club where people can go and eat, drink, gamble, or just watch some TV. I go as a guest of someone, and have enjoyed my trips to the club.

The main attraction of the day is a game called two-up. Its pretty much simplest gambling game ever. You have a guy whose the spinner. He has a small wooden bit that has three coins on them. The spinner flicks the coins into the air, and which ever face is showing twice...that side wins.

So, people bet on this. People will say, "10 dollars on head!" and they'll find someone who wants to place ten dollars on tails. The spinner does his thing, and whoever wins the toss keeps the money.

I was told that Australians played this game in the trenches in WWII, betting cigarettes, which makes the game make a bit more sense. Add to the fact that its only legal on Anzac Day and you get a lot of people cheering on coins.

The best part is, anyone can be the spinner. You just get in line and you get to do it. Here's where the game becomes awesome. When you're the spinner you put down a bet, say ten dollars, that you will toss heads. This is called the pot. Someone in the crowd matches the pot. If the spinner throws heads...he keeps the money and gets to spin again. Throw a tails, and the spinner loses the money and can no longer be the spinner.

First time I spin...heads. I get to keep going. Now, the money isn't mine yet. To collect it, I need to throw three heads in a row. But, each time, the value of the pot increases. So, my ten dollar bet was now twenty.

I have to add, the best part of two-up is that every roll (or toss, spin, hand, I heard it called all these things) half the crowd cheers and the other half groans. Its awesome.

I throw heads again. Its up to forty. Then, some bloke makes a side bet on the pot, adding another 20 bucks to the equation.

"COME ON SPINNAH!!!" yells the Ringmaster. Thats my cue.

I step in the ring, the crowd is cheering (I'm not joking, they love their two-up) and flick the coins in the air. The Ringmaster looks over the coins...

"HEADS!"

Now, I'm not known for my math skills, but I do know that probability was about to go to tails. I had won three in a row, and even though I could keep spinning and collect money at a reduced percentage if it came up tails, I decided to keep the 100 bucks and buy more beer.

Later on in the evening I was joking around with some Aussies about Anzac Day and I said, "So basically, you remember your vetrans as early as possible and then get pissed and gamble for the rest of it?" I fully expected to hear, "Nah, its much more then that," but the general consesnsus was, "Yup."

So, I spent ANZAC Day in a fantastic mood, which is how most of the people I saw spent it. A good day though. I think it beats the American Memorial Day tradition of camping any day of the week.

Come on spinner,

Alan

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Tuesday, April 24, 2007

My favourite pic

As promised, here's what I consider my best pic down here.


Its of Port Phillip Bay from St. Kilda pier, looking back on Melbourne, with sunbreaks.

As I explain below, I've been real busy, but here are the posts you can expect soon.

~Melbourne retroactive post.
~Aussie Rules Football
~The Melbourne Cricket Ground (may be combined with Aussie Rules post)
~ANZAC Day

Here are some more pics of Melbourne at the Facebook album.

I get the day off tomorrow (ANZAC Day), but lots of things will be closed so not sure if I'll be posting.

Until then,

Alan

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Monday, April 23, 2007

I'm still alive

Dear Loyal Readers,

I'm still alive. I have not been captured by Kangaroos. I'm doing quite well.

See, I've had this paper due, and I figured that instead of pracrastinating by doing blog posts, I should procrastinate by doing other things. So, the site has been fairly dead for awhile.

Probably after my tute today I'll post more. Of course, by then it will be early morning for all you guys and this will get buried under a heap of posts.

Oh well, see you tonight.

Alan

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Sunday, April 15, 2007

Melbourne: Day 3

When we last left off, I wanted to go down to Port Phillip Bay. Considering Melbourne is built all around said Pot Phillip Bay, I figured how hard could it be to find it.

Probably, not really that hard. But, when have I made things easy on myself?

Heading out the door at 11:00 (not sporting my Essendon hat, as I would be headed to rival territory and they lost) I set out to find the beaches of Melbourne. I headed past Telstra Dome and towards the Docklands. I planned to follow the Yarra River to the bay and then walk the beaches. But, a funny thing happened to that plan: the Port of Melbourne Industrial Park.

I walked through the park, smiling to the occasional biker, wondering when I'd get to the ocean. After a bit, I decided to take a picture of a rather large ship. That how I stumbled across Fishermen's Bend.

Fishermen's Bend is at the mouth of the Yarra, and true to its name there were fishermen abound there. I thought I was home free, but alas, the beach front there was private. So, I went through an environmental reclamation park, which was quite scenic and very nice and I probably would have enjoyed it heaps had it not been for the sign at its entrance.

"BEWARE OF SNAKES"

Besides are dashing good looks and great tastes in hats, Indiana Jones and I have one other thing in common. We don't like snakes. So, I was fairly on edge going through here. Didn't see any, and I'm not going back to look for them.

The park trail put me out on a road that led me directly to the Beachfront Trail. Jackpot! Port Phillip Bay is massive (I know, somewhere, a geography teacher is slapping his head. "Of course the bay is massive!" he is shouting at the screen.) I've always liked the ocean, and one of the things I like about it is when you look out onto it and just stare into the vast emptiness. I always thought it was cool. And yes, I did go out ont a pier, turn to the Northeast and look towards home. Its something I do, I guess. Anyway, I find the vastness of the ocean to be kind of inspiring and intimidating at the same time.

At the trail head, it said St. Kilda pier was 6.8 km away. No worries!

I walked further down the beach, stopping for lunch (a seafood platter, with chips plus a glass of wine. Loved it. Especially the wine.) Where I stopped for lunch, there was a band playing. Just a cover band, but one of the songs they did was "What a Wonderful World." It seemed so fitting. On a pier, drinking wine, watching the waves crash along the shore. What could make the world more wonderful?

An ice cream cone, thats what. So, I got one as I continued down the beach. I felt like a little kid again. Ice cream and ocean. If I could have those two things for the rest of my life, I'd nearly be set.

One of the most bizarre things I saw today was just west of St. Kilda (kind of weird to refer to points along the shore on an east-west axis). It was kiteboarding. A guy gets on a surfboard, and then holds onto a massive kite. The kite catches the wind and then pulls the boarder through the surf. Fascinating to watch, and I'm sure its heaps fun to try. Maybe someday I'll do it.

Continuing on, at this point walking for four hours, I got to St. Kilda pier. It seemed a bit unerwhelming. There was a nice park, and a good view (I did take a picture that I think is the best one I've taken down here...it'll be up tomorrow) but it wasn't to special. I did see Luna Park, which is an amusement park, famous for its laughing face entrance. If you are scared of clowns, I would reccomend staying away frm Luna Park.

There was a street fair going on nearby, and I purchased a watercolour painting of the Yarra at sunset. Looks really cool. After that, despite my love of the ocean, I pulled myself away from it to walk home.

There was one problem. Outside of "walk towards the large buildings in the general direction of here you came from" I didn't exactly know how to get back to the hostel. I used that strategy, fairly effectively (though probably not efficiently, now that I've looked at a map). Two hours of Melbourne and I came across a large tower. It was lit up, and it looked really cool, so I took a picture of it. Then, it donned on me that I had seen this before. It was the Art Centre down by the Yarra River! At an instant, I knew where I was, and quickly, albeit gingerly, made the walk home.

A little over six hours of walking, but pleanty of beaches to be seen. Although I'm tired and quite sore now, today was worth it.

Back to Canberra tomorrow. I leave at 7 am, and will undoubtedly be sleeping on the bus.

Alan

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Saturday, April 14, 2007

Melbourne: Day 2

Not a whole lot of sight-seeing done today. After a quick breakfast it was back down to the Melbourne Cricket Ground to watch the Carlton Blues take on my now beloved Essendon Bombers.

This was also a rivalry week in the AFL, so I expected a good game. The teams didn't disappoint. On top of that, I thought I was in the front row on level two. Instead, I was right on the fence, first row. Not bad for thirty bucks. Got some great shots of the action and of the stadium.

Aussie Rules Football isn't hard to pick up on. If you catch the ball off of a kick, you get a free kick (called a mark). Any ball kicked between the two uprights is worth six points (called a goal) and if its between one of those posts and another to the outside of the main goal its worth one point (called a behind). Other then that, I honestly believe anything goes.

Essendon put on a display in the first quarter, scoring 55 points. It was an absolute joy to watch. They ended up taking a thirty point lead into halftime. (Quarters in the AFL are 30 minutes long)

However, Carlton came back, thanks to a third period where they kicked seven goals. They ended up taking the lead heading into the fourth quarter.

The fourth was up and down action. Just when the Blues seemed to put it away, Essendon would answer. Once Essendon got within a few points, Carlton kicked a goal. It was thrilling, an emotional roller coaster...and I didn't know the rules that well. You can just feel the excitement.

In the end though, the Blues would win it by a few points, 124-121. The 64,000 plus in attendence were thoroughly entertained.

The Australian Football is unlike anything I've ever seen. It'll warrant its own post (with pictures even) once I get back to Canberra. Lots of tradition in the game, and the atmosphere was like that of a college game. Great times.

Its also possible that the MGC itself earns its own post. This coming week could be busy on the blog, so watch this space.

Tomorrow its up to Port Phillip Bay and exploring some of Melbourne I haven't seen yet. Until then...

Alan

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Friday, April 13, 2007

Melbourne: Day 1

Time to recap the day's events from Melbourne. I would be uploading photos but the computers at the hostels don't like that. So...I won't. This means I get to do another retroactive post when I return to Canberra.

I got in last night after about eight hours on a bus. Thankfully, we stopped in Aubry, a town right on the border between New South Wales and Victoria. A sign at the train station said that Aubrey was a major point in the Australian rail system as it was where the gauge (size, more or less)of the rails would switch. For being such an important place it was quite small though. Seemed like a nice quiet town.

Anyway, it was good that we stopped there as it gave me a chance to eat. I was famished, and not looking forward to coming to Melbourne on an empty stomach.

Bus arrived in Melbourne at 9:30, and from the station it was just a short walk to the Melbourne Backpackers Connection Hostel. After I got checked into the hostel I went for a stroll. Two reasons behind the walk. 1) I had been on a bus for way to long. 2) I wanted a beer.

Central Melbourne does not lack for clubs, but I didn't want a club. I didn't want loud blaring music, no live band, no ten dollar cover charge. I just wanted a beer. This was apperently to hard to ask for. I ended up going to bed at about 12, sans beer. which is a recent record for me (the time being the record, not the going without beer).

Today I started my day at about ten. Just down the road is the Melbourne Observation Deck. Figuring a good way to see the city was to get on top of it, I went for it. The views from the top were breathtaking. Would have been even better had it not been a really hazy day. Of course, it was here that I realized that my digital camera had a bum screen (see previous post) so that put a slight damper on the day, but I soldiered on.

I went past Telstra Dome (not to be confused with Telstra Stadium, which is in Sydney) to Victoria Harbour. Lots of really neat statues down there. In fact, the entire city has unique architecture. The people designing the buildings here aren't afraid to use different colours (sorry Ike...its a habit now). In fact, the Customs Building is a orange, black, and white. It looks anything but official, but it works. I'm no expert in architecture, but I feel that Melbourne has done a splendid job combining old, new, and modern architecture into its cityscape.

Beuty in contrast. There will be photos to back this up later.

I wound my way down the Yarra River, which gives excellent views of the city. The whole feel down on the river walk was a relaxed one. One image in particular stands out to me. It was a business man, wearing a suit and tie, sitting on the grass with his co-workers. He had his shoes and socks off, just relaxing there having a good time. It didn't seem out of place, it didn't seem strange. I suppose thats how Australians escape the rat race.

The Yarra led me down to Batman Avenue (I swear I'm not making this up) which takes you to Melbourne Park. Here is where the Ron Larver Arena is (home of the Australian Open), the Melbourne Cricket Ground, and various other sporting venues. I bought a ticket for tomorrow's AFL match (Go Bombers), somewhat ironically at the Collingwood Club's head quarters.

I then did a bit of souvenier shopping, before heading back to the hostel. After a day of walking, I didn't feel like going back out again, so I'm calling it an early night.

A full report of the AFL match awaits tomorrow. So far, my new favourite teams are 0-2 when I watch them in person the first time. Hopefully, Essendon can reverse that tomorrow.

Until then...

Alan

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Thursday, April 12, 2007

A bit of bad news.

A bit of sad news as I begin my trip into Melbourne. The screen on my camera has cracked. Half of its out, and the colour isn't great on it. This makes taking pictures a tad bit difficult.

The good news is, I can still take pics, and they still turn out great. Really, looking at what I've got so far, I'm practically thrilled with how they've come out.

Computer at the hostel's being difficult, or else I'd upload some. As for now, its off to see more of Melbourne...and take pics!

More to come later,

Alan

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Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Off to Melbourne

Tommorow, I head down to Melbourne. SOmething you probably deduced from the title of this post. I'll spend four nights in the capital of Victoria.

For everything you ever wanted to know about Australia's second largest city...might I reccomend the highly academic Wikipedia.

Melbourne is arguably the sports capital of the nation. Australian Rules Football is huge in Victoria, and Melbourne is home to 9 clubs in the AFL. The city is also home to the Melbourne Cricket Ground which is a world famous cricket venue. The city recently hosted the World Swimming Championships and of course tennis' Australian Open is held here. Needless to say, I think I'll find something to do.

Also, according to Lonely Planet, Melbourne is big on coffee. I'm big on coffee. Win, win. There's a chance I'll be wired enough to stay awake the entire seven hour bus ride home.

Of course, this time around I will be bringing both digital camera and digital camera connect-to-computer thingamajig so I can upload photos whilst down there.

What do you mean I'm not technologically inclined? What tipped that off?

Anyway, there should be reports coming from Melbourne in the next few days. If not, I return to Canberra on Monday (Sunday for most of you).

The hope of the weekend is to take in an Essendon Bombers AFL match. Normally I wouldn't support a team thats been so succesful over the years (they are tied for most AFL/VFL premierships with 16) but considering they finished 15th last season I guess the bandwagon is fairly empty. Plus, black and red is a sweet colour combo. They take on the Carlton Blues at the MCG on Saturday.

On the other hand, it does seem really weird saying "Go Bombers." Oh well.

Go Bombers,

Alan

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Friday, April 06, 2007

Old Res Wedding

As you may recall from my post about O-Week, life in residences is a bit different then it is in the States. The best possible example of this would have to be Old Res Wedding, something I had the privelege of attending a few days ago.

With the festivities set to kick off at six thirty, most people on Res begin drinking at four or so. Got to do this right. I abstain from such activities yet because I have a lot of beer and not a lot of liquor. Following the old addage Beer before liquor, never sicker, I hold off on joining the fray right away, instead I get ready for the event.

This is not an ordinary party. After all, the word "Wedding" is included. Its a dress up affair. So, break out the shirt and tie and get ready to wow the crowd. I was informed that I looked good by numerous people, some of them attractive women with Australian accents. This night is starting our the right way.


At six thirty, with six pack of Jim Bean and coke in hand, I head over to one of the common rooms for the "Buck Party" (the women head over to another place for the Hen party.) Basically, this is a bachelor party. Everyone drinks...a lot, they "draw" for a groom (meaning they put our names in the hat pick one, but have already determined who the groom would be.) We ate some sandwiches, drank some more. Life is good.

My friend Tommy is "selected" to be groom. This basically means that he gets to drink more then the rest of us and is guranteed a pash (kiss) from the bride later that night. Congrats to him. We sing to him, egging him on to skull whatever someone hands him. Good times. I get sung to a few times as well, probably because I was representing the Northern Hemisphere.

"Its a lot of pressure, representing an entire hemisphere. But I think I can handle it," I tell on the of SRs.

(And seriously, there was nobody from the Northern Hemisphere there. No Americans, Europeans, Canadians, Asians...nobody.)

In the meantime, the big screen TV is showing hilights of past Masters tournaments. The general concensus: golf sucks. So, some one puts a porno into the DVD player. We then proceed to make fun of the movie from its bad writing to worse acting. Then we drank some more. Do you see a trend here?

Somewhere in between all of this I went back to my room to get more drinks (note to self: XXXX is possibly the worst beer ever) and on the way back started singing Phi Mu Alpha songs. It was a good night.

Eventually, because no bachelor party is complete without one, a stripper shows up. Gives Tom a lap dance, does her thing. One of my friends asks me how this compares to frat parties back in the States.

"This is right up there with the best of them," Cheers to that, you can guess what happened next.

After the stripper finishes up, we mingle for a little while, drinking more. I meet up with an Australian who tells me he went to Tennessee.

"You know Rocky Top?" he asks.

"Hell yeah Rocky Top!" I reply, we then sing the chorus from Rocky Top, something that would have bewildered the bejesus out of anyone else had they not been totally pissed. Like I said, it was a fun night.

We then go over and meet up with the girls who are just as drunk as we are. The "wedding" involves a guy playing a priest yelling something a long the following:

"CAN I GET AN AMEN!"

Crowd: AMEN

Preiset: I CAN'T HEAR YOU?

Crowd: AMEN!!

Preist: I THINK NEW RES AND ARSCOTT ARE STILL SLEEPING! WAKE 'EM UP!!

Crowd: AMEN!!!! (as loud as possible)

Then there was some part where we knelt and said some sort of prayer or blessing for the new couple, who then kissed. We cheered. Some girl asked if I wanted some of her drink, and by ask I mean put to my lips and poured down throat. Fun times, fun times indeed.

We then went to the Uni Bar and got strange looks from people who couldn't figure out why we were all wearing suits and the such were here.

Overall, just a fantastic night, somehow made even better by the fact that this happened (and was supported by) Residential Services.

I love this country.

Alan

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Wednesday, April 04, 2007

News from the other side of the world: Volume 4

Its been awhile since I've done one of these.

The big story is the Tsunami in the Solomon Islands. Both Australia and New Zealand have pitched in with the relief efforts. Now there's concern about disease. The tsunami also raised concerns about Australian safety and the day of the quake, a lot of shoreline businesses closed down.

One of the biggest stories down here is that of Ian Thorpe accused of doping by a French newspaper. Ian Thorpe is, not surprisingly, trying to clear his name. This is apperently wearing him down. There's also a lot of debate amongst Australians as to weather or not he did it. This sounds a lot like the cases of Lance Armstrong and Floyd Landis which, if they have taught us anything its don't fully trust these tests or the French media. This story could become huge depending on further revelations.

In addition to clearing his name, Thorpe is "embarrased to be Australian" over the treatment of Aboriginal people.
The debate on Euthenasia just got a lot hotter due to this Sydney case.

There's a lot of controversy about how Australia's Aviation Safety council handled a plane crash two years ago.


Western Australia's got bank all of a sudden.


I love sports, and I love the media, so when the two collide its a must read for me. Telstra is quite upset about how its NRL video is being used.

Glenn McGrath is coming after England in the World Cup. The match is only 4 days away and the Ashes Series is still on the minds of Australians. (The Ashes is a cricket series Australia plays against England. The Aussies usually win, but not this year. That didn't go over so well.)

A light edition this time, but as always happy reading.

Alan

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Monday, April 02, 2007

The Touch Footy Post

Its been asked for, maybe even demanded. And now, I bring you the touch footy post.

Right now most of you are thinking, what is footy? Is Alan getting some hot Australian action that he's not telling us about? In reality, footy is another name for rugby so you can go ahead and feel silly now.

No one realls calls rugby "rugby" down here. Its footy. Channel 9 even advertises for Friday Night Footy and Monday Nght Footy (which to my delight, does not feature John Madden.) You don't ask if the rugby's on, you don't say you're watching the rugby. Its footy. Not that if you call it rugby, the locals will look at you strange, but you learn pretty quick that rugby is referred to as footy.

So, as you can guess, touch footy is....touch rugby. Given what you know about rugby (not a lot, I'm presuming) you're probably wondering how touch footy works. Wouldn't you just get touched over and over again with everything ending in a draw?

Not if you use league rules! There are two forms of rugby, and we'll get into those a while later. But, in league rules, after a tackle (or in this case touch) the defense must back up 10 metres and allow the offense some space to advance the ball.

Other than that, standard rugby rules apply: pass it backwards, five touches till turnover, ground the ball on the try, and don't drop the ball. A rule I became familar with in this evenings comp.

I've delayed writing this post because I wanted to actually get a feel for the game before I wrote about it. The first week I was confused as confused could be. I knew to pass backwards, but the defense backing up part? What was that?

So, I'd run a bit, we'd get a tackle, back up a little before hearing the ref, "back with me, white shirt!" (I was wearing a white shirt, but you figured that out.) So, I did a lot of running, a lot of not figuring out the game, and we got killed something like 10-3.

The next two weeks I gradually got in the flow. I was able to read plays a bit, get some good runs (with the ball even!) and had a lot more fun, though I swear the ref backs up more then 10 metres. This especially sucks when the other team goes on a long run on the opposite side of the field. Because, you then have to run that distance (not after them, you stay spread out to maintain a line) plus the additional ten metres. Because if your team makes a tackle whilst offside...its another 5 touches to the other team.

Personally, I thought touch footy would make a great fun cross country practice. (A practice where you run to keep your legs fresh, but not neccesarily work them because there's a meet coming up. In high school this was usually a game of Ultimate played seemingly 20 aside)

This week, my team, the mighty Pink Salmons (record 0-3...2 by forfit since we didn't have enough girls on our team) showed up to the oval to take on the Lions. This was sure to be an amazing clash that would wow the UCU Touch Club for years to come.

The score was tied 1-1 in the first half when the Salmon used some brilliant running to get close to the Lions try line. I slipped out to wing (close to sideline). My friend Beela gets on a run but just as he's touched (and has drawn the outside defender in) he passes the ball out to me. I'm thinking "Holy s***! I'm about to score a try!" Knowing I had to ground the ball, I glance up to judge how far I had to run before grounding.

At that point the ball hit me square in the hands and fell to the ground. Somehwere, John Madden is informing the world how you can't take your eyes off the ball.

Later in the half, the score is now 2-1 in favor of the Mighty Salmon. Once again, we've gotten the ball close to the try line, once again I'm on the wing. Once again Beela has drawn in the defense and throws me the ball.

"Don't drop it again, moron." I said to myself. It worked, I secured the ball, sprinted across the line, and put the ball down. I had scored a try, I was God of Touch Footy. As Kenny Maine might say, "I am amused by the simplicity of this game, bring me your finest meats and cheeses."

I was then promptly offside on the ensuing tap (starting the next possession). I was no longer God of Touch Footy, but I'd still take some of those cheeses.

Later on in the half, the Lions are threatening the Salmon try line. They send a ball out wide, which goes over its intended target and right onto my fingertips. The ball hits my hand, falls to the ground. I'm thinking "Lateral! You can pick this up and run!" So I do. I scopp the ball off the ground and sprint off for the try line. This is sweet.

Have you ever wondered what goes through a football players mind while he's running down the field with a defender chasing him. If its anything like how I felt its something like this:

"I'm going to score! Wahoo! Nothing between me and the tryline! Unless that guy catches me! (look back) No, I can beat him! I'm totally getting my second try of the game! (look back) Dude, he's gaining. He's fast. My high school nickname was the Sloth. Afterburners...go! Now slide, ground the ball! Aww man...I think he got me a metre from the try line."

The two of us (myself and the defender) now await the teams to come down the field. Except they aren't coming. Instead, I see the ref waving us back down there. I jog back down the field where one of my teammates informs me, "You dropped the ball."

Yeah, even that little brush off my fingertips was a "knock-on" which brought the ball over to the other team. My fellow Salmon were impressed with my run, even though it didn't count. That made me feel a little better, but having to go from second try of the game to playing defense right away....not as fun.

Overall though, touch footy is a fun game. If you want more information, here's the Australian national site.

Here's what the highly academic Wikipedia has to say about it.

I might buy a rugby ball over here and teach the game to you guys back home. Besides, throwing and kicking a rugby ball round is fun. We shall see.

Oh, and in the excitement of the three posts yesterday I forgot to mention...THE EELS WON!!! A thrilling golden point win over the Wests Tigers. A joy to watch.

Till next time,

Alan

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